God Provides

For you who shares with me in the previous month since my exam period, i think you already know what I am kanchiong with. Basically, my NPGS demands me to produce 4.00 minimum CGPA every semester, however, the result from my 1st semester was 4.16. which is one mark shy from that minimum CGPA. So I was really stressed out the whole semester, which peaked on the last week before exams (see my things to do around march-may, you'll know why). After the exams, I was not confident at all with my performance. And so I began to be uneasy.

It might sounds a bit over-the-top. mathematically, I just need to produce 2 B+ and 1 B, and I'm still (marginally) safe. I mean, how hard was that? But yet I can't get it out of my mind. I think I have asked A LOT of ppl to pray for me for two things: (1) for me to be able to calm myself down and (2) for the result itself to be enough for passing the minimum requirements.

The result for the undergrads came out a few days earlier than the result for the grad students. Seeing my friend got their results gives me the ikea meatball filling. On one hand, I am happy for them, and I felt that I got hope as well. On the other hand, I grew even more uneasy, since I can't wait under that kind of stress. Thankfully, last week was quite hectic so I got a lot of distractions.

The result was supposed to come out on the 13th. So I waited on 12th until the turn of the day. right at 12 I pressed F5.

And the result is not out yet. -__-'

I waited another 5 minutes. Maybe it was not 13th yet on NTU server. I pressed F5 again.

And the result is not out yet. -_______-'

I pressed and pressed and pressed. Several ppl already asked me on gtalk: Irving, Indra, Kuncup, Maria, Itin. I said: Not yet. I waited until 1 am, finishing "Burlesque" on the process (It's nice. But the ending was lacking epicness). I pressed F5 again.

And the result is not out yet. -______________-'

I figured that I need to go to sleep early, since I will have Machine Learning Summer Studies at Biopolis for a week starting on th 13th (I'll write about this later). There I was, praying the 2 prayer points again. Miraculously, I am able to go to sleep directly. Thank God for that. The result was not out even when I woke up. So I muster up my mind and went to Biopolis. I can't get my hand off from my iPhone the whole day. I think the battery was running as low as 15% at 3 o'clock. Haha.

At 5 o'clock (with 6% of battery left), an email came. Saying that the result is out. Right in the middle of the seminar I went silent, and without realizing, I was praying for the same two prayer points again, but this time, I add another: so that I can accept anything that God deemed suitable. I logged in from my phone.

And I was stunned. @_@ That was the highest mark I've ever had my whole life. I was not paying attention to the seminar at all for 10 minutes or so, praising God and praying the whole time.

I was reminded once again, that God really provides. That He give according to His infinite wisdom to His people what is good in His time. I may fail the first sem (got scolded hard from my prof. haha) but it made this sem much more sweeter. And God truly gives abundantly. I was reminded on how beautiful it is to have brothers and sisters to share our burden with, praying for each other and hoping for the best to come to each of us.

So thank you for those who have prayed for me on this one. Papah, Benchers, Exco 07/08, Nesha, Indra, Pak Win, Bu Henny, Ci Mel, KTB bawah, flatmates.. I really appreciate it =). (sorry if i forgot to mention someone there. i think I ranted too much to everyone.. haha).

On sidenote, Exco 07/08 did another EST last saturday after DnD wedding. It was magnificent. I'll write something later on. =)

Let there be light!


There was a time when I lost my desire to write and to share. There was a time when I didn't see the point of doing a blog to express my thought. I am who I am though, inconsistent as I am in doing this blog, but I do want to share and I do long to write. Today I'm giving it another go. Fingers crossed. But I still wish that "Let there be light" is the message that I convey.
  • January 1st 2012, Kristo